Sailors Story of Don't Ask Don't Tell
Author: Robaire Watson

My name is Robaire Watson and I'm a gay military veteran. Who's been living in the San Francisco Bay Area for 18 years. I spent 6 years in the Navy as an openly gay military man.

Now, I've spent the last year sending out over a 1000 emails and mailing at least 200 letters, asking gay organizations, magazines and media about allowing me to tell my story. When it comes to Don't Ask, Don't Tell. Boy! Do I have a story to tell.

I'm starting to notice, since I don't look like Jake Gyllenhaal and I'm not under 30 years old or have the body of Colton Ford. Their not interested! I've received replies stating "There's nothing we can do for you".

I just want to bring a positive story to the forefront and not a negative one. This could change the ways people view gays in the military. I feel that someone somewhere is going to understand this. We're living in uncertain times and people want to hear something that is different and not sad, or a poor me story. It's about making people feel good and understanding that we will overcome this problem.

I was a US Navy Ship's barber who served aboard the USS Kansas City as it traveled the seas promoting freedom during the Gulf War and Operation Southern Watch--off the coast of Somalia in 1993, traveling to Singapore, Thailand, Hong Kong, Dubai, Jebel Ali, UAE, British Columbia, Mexico, and the Philippines during my two enlistments. I'm black and openly gay and never encountered the slightest discrimination aboard his warship.

What was I thinking, I asked myself, joining the Navy knowing that I'm gay? I decided that, "I'm going to be who I am, I'm not going to let them change me; people don't need to feel threatened by my Sexual Preference." Easy to say perhaps, difficult to do.

I designed my own personal freedom by sheer willpower and personality. During the early 1990s, it also helped that there was an expectation in the military that President Clinton would issue an executive order allowing gay and lesbian patriots to serve openly. It did not happen, but in many commands there had been a preparedness to enable those who did their jobs well to be able to serve without discrimination. I Petty Officer Watson and many others benefited from that brief bubble in time when some commands demonstrated that they could make it happen without difficulty. When the Don't Ask Don't Tell law was passed, my shipmates told me, "Watson, we don't have to ask and we don't have to tell."

I had a group of gay friends on the USS Kansas City. We were the gay version of "Sex in the City" onboard the ship. All my shipmates & ship personnel knew about me and my friends. So, don't let all those horror stories and murders be the only stories to be told.

I grew up in Crane, Texas, and never encountered racism. Apparently everyone knew I was gay, as well, according to my parent's totally unsurprised when I came out to them at age 23. The only family members I've told that I was gay are my mother , father and older bother. The rest of my family knows, but they don't talk about it. My family is very proud of me and what I've done with my life. I'm the middle child of a nominally Southern Baptist Texas family. My grandfather served in the Army in World War I. I was in the Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts, played high school football, and was into cars and music. I always knew I was gay.
After high school, I earned money for college by working in the oil fields. I studied design and fashion merchandising in Dallas at Wades School of Design. I wanted to see the world, however, and like many young men I wanted to get a bit further away from home. I joined the US Navy in 1989 and served six years through two enlistments until 1995.

I've spent the last year trying to have my story told by the media, after leaving my job in the publishing world. I'm working on having my story reach a massive amount of gay & military veterans and personnel, without someone else deciding whether or not, if my story is good enough to be told.